Going Deeper, Lasting Longer

Title: Going Deeper, Lasting Longer (1/?)

Author: Brooke

Email: yabbadabbadome13@yahoo.com

Rating: NC-17

Disclaimer: I don’t own anything. I wished I owned the two Xanders’ from “The Replacement” though. Buffy and friends are owned by Joss, Mutant Enemy, 20th Century Fox, The UPN and whoever else has rights to the show.

Summary: Set after “Holding Out” and “PDA”. Buffy and Xander are in love. Xander asked Buffy to marry him. Buffy said yes. So they’re getting married, right?

Distribution: I don’t know why anybody would want this, but if somebody does…sure.

Feedback: Definitely!! Tell me if it sucked or if you liked it. Whatever. Just write back!

Authors Note: This takes place in an AU season 4. Xander and Anya weren’t that serious, and Riley was never there.

Dedicated to Shawn because is he my NC-17 guru. Keep the fluff alive!!!!!J

Summers’ House

Buffy’s Room

12:45 AM

Her mom was home. Buffy was well aware of that, she was right down the hall. Last Buffy checked her door was open too. She was doing bills, so she was up later than usual. Dawn was home too. Her younger sister shared a wall with her, and Buffy knew that she was awake because she had just heard, what she assumed, was a shoe hit the wall behind her dresser.

Buffy didn’t care though. She had locked her door, and her mother didn’t ask questions beyond ‘Are you careful?’ and she hadn’t even asked that in months.

Plus, Buffy was an adult. If she wanted to have reckless loud sex with her boyfriend…scratch that, her fiancée, in her bed, she was allowed to. She had to add that ‘loud’ part because the noises both she and Xander were making warranted recognition and self-justification. They weren’t even trying to be quiet anymore.

The position they were in was a little uncomfortable for her, as her left leg was pulled up so that her knee was bent over his shoulder and her right lay next to his on the bed. “Harder,” Buffy moaned out, and Xander complied wordlessly.

His arms were braced on either side of her body, the muscles in them straining with each thrust. Buffy could only see the top of his head as he bent over her chest, bowed sucking at her breasts and biting at her taut nipples. She was groaning with each thrust, a noise shooting out of her throat every time his hips came down unevenly on hers, driving his cock so deep into her that she swore that he had broken something inside of her to force in his solid length. And he was doing it so hard. So fast.

“Buffff…Uhhhh God…” Xander groaned out against her right breast. His sweat sheened body sliding against hers almost as easily as his cock was sliding in and out of her tight cunt. He had made Buffy that much tighter by lifting her leg the way he had and he could feel her vaginal wall stretching to fit him with every thrust into her body. Xander loved the silky, hot, wet feel of her clenching him inside her.

Buffy, on the other hand, loved the sound of them together. His moans coincided perfectly with hers; the bellows matching the high pitched whines. The wet slapping of his skin against hers hard and rough, made so by the combination of their most intimate fluids leaking out of her body in abundance even before the act had ended. The way they called out each others names and whispered how it felt to be connected this way. She loved how their voices sounded.

“Xa…Xan…Xan, ohohohohGaw…faster Xander…harder.” She didn’t even know if he could hear her, she could barely hear herself. All the blood pounding in her ears making her own voice sound distant. Xander managed to pick up his already frantic pace, forcing the air from her lungs and slamming the leg over his shoulder into her body to fast for her to even register the discomfort as he filled her in every way possible.

Buffy felt his tongue slide upwards from between her breasts, leaving a warm wet trail in its roughly gentle wake. Xander slid his mouth all over her throat and she threw her head back to let him, to encourage him. He kissed his way lightly, despite the actions of his hips, up the side of her neck to the spot just below and behind her right ear, tonguing and lapping at it before scrapping it with his teeth,

Buffy heard her throat release a sort of groan/cry that only happened when he hit that spot. Xander switched his position inside her and he pushed more to the right, smiling when he hit something in her that earned him *that* noise again. He felt her foot bend down and her toes curl into the flesh on his back. He hit that spot again. And heard the noise again.

He bent his head down quickly and pressed a wet kiss on the red mark that he had already left on her collar bone, his fingers shifting at her side to brush the one tat he had left on the edge of her lower back. Xander brought one hand up, sliding it up her body, tickling over the skin of her breasts, caressing the side of her face and over the corner of her lip, which kissed at its tip when it passed. Xander brought his eyes up to look at her while his hand continued it’s journey, brushing the fallen sticky hair out of her face, and then traced up her arm and hand, which he clasped in it’s position grasping the head board behind her. Both working to brace her against his movements and leveraging herself enough to counter.

Buffy must have felt him watching her because her eyes snapped open focused dazedly on his. The arousal being seen, accepted, and returned between the two of them in that one gaze. Buffy licked her lips slowly, their panting breaths dueling between them as their actions forced it out of them.

“Kiss…me…” Buffy managed to breathe out quickly in time with his thrusts, and Xander immediately obeyed, meeting her halfway as she leant up. Xander forced her head back down on the pillow with his kiss; his head leant to the side as his tongue fought wetly with hers, both moaning into each others mouths. He was working his hardest to force the Slayer to submit and loving all the same that she wouldn’t.

Xander reset himself, this time brings his knees further up so that he could kneel and get more leverage more in front of her. He won the kiss war with that move and felt her tongue drop out of his mouth with a deep moan that he swallowed. He stabbed himself into her harder and deeper once more and she emitted a high pitched squeak. He swallowed that, too.

Buffy’s mind screamed, partly because her mouth was occupied sucking on his tongue, but mostly because what Xander was doing had temporarily taken any hopes of collecting her voice away. Xander was moving so fast and in such short strokes that he was almost vibrating inside of her already throbbing sex. Buffy couldn’t even make her eyes open, she was so in love with that feeling, and it didn’t stop.

She felt Xander’s strong hand, the one that had been joined with her on the headboard, now groping at her sweat soaked thigh on his chest, readjusting her body against him and she could feel his hand shaking. She was shaking, too.

Then Xander did something else that he loved, something that drew a gravelly cry from raw throat, and he kissed her. He began rolling his hips into her, forcing his cock even deeper into her, not even really pulling out, just shoving himself further inside. This always accompanied the ‘vibration move’ since he couldn’t keep that pace for long, and only executed it when she was about to come. He could probably feel her tightening around him, she knew she could.

Xander seemed content with this rhythm, allowing him to caress every inch of Buffy’s inner walls. He just rubbed his dick against them slickly, loving the feel of her clenching and tightening around him. He bent to kiss her again, preparing himself for his end, knowing that it was almost time. He kept his pace and caught her lower lip between his in a short kiss then repeated the process with her upper one. Buffy was barely coherent enough to respond while he licked at her mouth, dry from the panting breaths, and rolled into her, forcing her to fit him in. And he was allowed so willingly.

She knew that he had to be touching places inside of her that she didn’t even think that doctors had discovered in the human body yet, and she accepted that this was how she, the Slayer, was going to die. The Slayer who had survived for seven years on a Hellmouth, who had avoided apocalypse three times, fought countless demons and monsters, had even spent four hours staking vampires that night, and managed to survive a ‘clothes recon mission’ from her younger sister, was going to die at the hands and lips of this man. Xander Harris.

And it became pleasurably clear and ironic that he was probably going the stab her in the heart…from the inside. She couldn’t even mentally laugh evilly at that thought because she was screaming.

“BUFFFYYYYYY!!!!!” Xander yelled as he was gripped hard inside her body, feeling every one of her contractions milk his shaft and he closed his eyes and let go. Giving himself to her in hard bursts. Buffy jerked beneath him and Xander hummed in bated breaths while his dick was squeezed with muscles that he knew only Buffy had.

Despite the waves of pleasure tearing through her she still felt Xander come inside of her. She focused on that feeling through everything and it heightened her pleasure more than he would ever know. She loved the feeling of his dick defying her vaginal contractions and bathing her inside with his hot essence in relentless spurts. It felt perfect.

Xander’s face was still relaxed and his eyes still closed as he carefully lowered her leg from his shoulder causing Buffy to release a tiny whine. He sunk down on top of her, kissing her once on lipslips before burying his face in her shoulder. Relaxing even further when her arms came to encircle his back, strong fingers gently combing through his damp hair.

“I love you,” he whispered into her neck while placing a light kiss on her and smiling at her giggle.

“Love you too,” Buffy replied in the same manner, bringing her hands to the sides of his face and bringing it to her to give him a light kiss. Xander complied with shaky breaths and Buffy brushed some of his sweaty hair back from his face.

He just let his eyes shut blissfully and let her tough him. “Xan,” she whispered.

“Hmmm?” he questioned with eyes still closed, his left hand finding hers on the side of his face and he traced the ring he gave her four months ago. The ring that ensured that Buffy Summers would be his wife in the near future.

“I haveta pee,” she said and Xander smiled for no reason. He reached over to her night table and grabbed the towel that rested over the alarm clock and handed it to her with a grin before setting himself and slowly pulling out of her. His grin turned to a full blown smile when he heard her groan at his retreat. If his voice could get that high he would’ve made it too.

Buffy made some quick clean-up moves under the covers before standing up, taking her time walking to the bathroom for more reasons than she would admit to tonight.

“If you’re sore tonight, wait till tomorrow morning.” Xander smirked form behind her and Buffy didn’t need to see him to know that his cheat was welling with pride. She couldn’t say that he didn’t deserve to feel that was either. She knew that she would feel it all through tomorrow and fully intended to give his an ego boost by telling him all about it every time she saw him.

“I’m just surprised that you’re still awake,” she jokes from the bathroom and laughed at the loud snore that Xander pointedly emitted. He continued to pretend he he was asleep and snoring until she entered the room again, this time, much to his disappointment wearing clothes. Nothing too concealing, but still more than her previous nakedness. Xander watched Buffy climb back into bed now wearing a tight white tank top and sheer white panties that he remembered them buying form Victoria’s Secret. he grinned as Buffy leant in to give him a quick kiss.

“If you had been asleep,” she settled against his chest, her head finding it’s nook comfortably under his chin. “I wouldn’t have held it against you.” Buffy kissed his on his bare shoulder, “After that…” she trailed off.

“Good?” Xander asked even though he already knew the answer.

“Mind blowing,” she whispered against the smooth skin under his chin.

Xander sighed when Buffy’s fingers scratched lightly over his abs. “I love it when you come inside of me,” she whispered.

“Why?” Xander questioned a sleepy grin on his face.

“I can feel it,” Buffy answered simply, “It makes me feel sort of…”

“Wet?” Xander suggested at her silence.

“No,” she huffed out a laugh.

“Sticky?” he asked next.

“Well actually yes to both of those,” she settled.

“Thought so,” he kissed against her head and felt her stretch against him.

“But I was gong to say ‘complete’.”

Xander had to kiss her. He tipped her chin up and pressed his lips firmly to hers only using a hint of tongue while they nipped at each other. “It does the same for me,” he assured. “Does the same for me.” They rested for a few moments in a drowsy silence.

“And Honey,” she added sleepily.

“Hmmm?” Xander breathed while tightening his hold around her waist.

“I thought I said no more neck hickies,” she yawned. “Doesn’t set a good example for all those vamps I have to kill.”


The Next Morning

Buffy loved waking up next to Xander. Absolutely loved it more than she ever thought she would, especially when he was already awake. She would open her eyes and he’d be smiling at her, waiting, like he knew that her eyes were about to open. His good morning kisses were another thing she loved. They were always the softest in the morning.

She thought about this every time they slept in the same bed together. Before she would open her eyes it was a sort of guessing game as to how Xander would be looking at her or if he would speak his greeting before or after the first kiss. He would always mix it up; keep her guessing, as if he knew she was always wondering.

Buffy felt the weight on Xander’s side of the bed shift before she felt his skin against hers. His leg hairs tickling the back of her thighs as he spooned behind her and put his arm around her stomach. She felt Xander fit his face into the space between her shoulder and neck, placing a light kiss there and then nestling his chin into the space. Buffy listened to him breathe for a moment before she moved her arm to rest on the one around her midsection, turning her head slightly before opening her eyes.

“Morning,” she sighed sleepily as she focused on his face while shifting her body so that they were facing each other. And then the kiss. Feather light, almost a tracing of his lips on hers.

“Morning,” Xander greeted in kind, bringing his hand up from around her waist to brush some of the hair out of her face. Buffy’s smile took on an almost shy tone as she brought her hands up to smooth out the bed hair she felt she must have, and Xander grinned, catching her wrists and bringing them away from her head. “You look beautiful when you wake up.”

Buffy gave him a half grin, “You’re already sleeping with me,” she joked, “You’re way past the cheesy compliments.”

“I’m never past the cheesy compliments,” Xander disagreed, “You never know when I’m going to screw up.”

Buffy giggled at him, “You should know by now that when you screw up the only way to fix it is through presents.”

“Presents?” Xander asked, eyebrows raised.

“Yep,” Buffy nodded, “Expensive ones.”

“So because you’re going to be my wife my compliments won’t get me out of the dog house anymore?”

Wife. Buffy clenched mentally. She loved Xander. More than anything she was sure she loved him. She wanted to be with him forever, that’s why she said ‘yes’ when he asked her to marry him. She didn’t know why she was surprised when he did ask her, she should have been waiting for it, it was such an obvious move. But when she saw him that day; down on one knee at the base of the stairs when she was on the way to the kitchen, she just about passed out. It was so normal and yet the grandest romantic gesture ever carried out. It was simply Xander and the embodiment of their whole relationship. And she said yes. She hurled herself down the stairs at him first, but she gave him a resounding affirmative to his proposal.

‘Second thoughts’ wouldn’t be the perfect term to describe what she was having, it was more of a deeper consideration of the situation. She was now seriously engaging in deeper consideration about being somebody's wife. Buffy had gotten engaged to him so that they would be together forever, but, and she stressed the BUT, turning into a wife was only a step away from turning into a mother. And deeper consideration was beating her in the head with the fact that she was too young for both of those titles. She had to be too young.

And there was nothing she could say. If she had nervous feelings about a guy before Xander was her guy. She could go to him and he would make everything make sense, relationship-wise. But now, Xander was literally her guy. She couldn’t possibly tell him that she didn’t know if she was ready to marry him just yet. She couldn’t tell him that the thought of having children scared the living crap out of her. There’s no way that he wouldn’t take that personally.

Especially since the date was already set. May 15. In five months on that day she would be married on San LaGuera Beach at 11 AM. The chairs had been rented, invitations were being sent, flowers brought, photographer arranged. She had her dress and they had picked out the wedding bands. They were in the process of meeting with the wedding planner to work out seating arrangements for the reception because, as her mother told her, five months is no time at all.

“Yeah,” Buffy answered vaguely not really remembering what exactly they had been talking about.

“You alright?” Xander asked, worry clearly present in his voice as he searched her eyes.

Buffy put on a smile she hoped wasn’t too shaky and nodded her head. “Still tired I guess,” she grinned, “You really wore me out last night.”

Xander’s bright and slightly smug smirk told her that her attempt at changing the topic was successful. He leant in and captured her lips, covering her mouth with his own, kissing her harder than he had before. Buffy kissed him back, pulling herself closer to his body as she opened her mouth more and ran her tongue lightly over his lower lip, an invitation that Xander accepted with a groan.

When Xander had woken that morning he had been… “geared up”, as the case may be. He was sure that Buffy knew since she had spent the majority of the time she was awake, so far, pressed against him, but despite her apparent willingness to suck his tongue down her throat he knew her better than that. He hated when she used physical attributes to deter him when he was onto her, especially since they were the hardest to turn down.

Buffy felt Xander’s hands raise to her shoulders and he pushed her away slightly, “Buff…” he was cut off as her hands grasped his wrists and moved his hands down the front of her tank top so that he was palming her breasts as she reattached her mouth to his.

The force that Buffy used to push her lips to his propelled Xander onto his back while Buffy’s hands came to rest on either side of his head while she kissed him, thrusting her upper body against his now groping hands. She had always found that the best way to put something behind her, as it were, was to, well, put something…in her. Granted, she knew she would eventually have to work out some sort of discussion method if she planned on making a marriage work, but as for the girlfriend/boyfriend aspect of the relationship…that practice was, to say the least, very well accepted.

Xander caught Buffy’s groan/whine in his mouth as she lifted her hips to straddle him, the length of his cock lined up with her slit, before she pulled away from his lips. Buffy merely looked down at him for a moment, her lower lip caught between her teeth while Xander’s hands came to rest on her hips. He tilted his head slightly and studied her trying to read the slight twinkle in her eyes.

“Are you going to tell me why the defense mechanism kicked in just now?” Xander questioned, “Or am I going to have to finish you off from last night?” His last remark going out confidently because he knew her ‘I’m still sore’ whine just as well as he knew the sound of…something he had heard a lot, that’s for damn sure.

Buffy didn’t move from on top of him and he rocked her slowly over his length. She contemplated her options, coming up with the only choice that would guarantee them waking up together again in the future… “Um…B.” she smiled at him.

“Alright,” Xander drawled out, his hands slipping up from her hips to the hem of her top, lifting it up as the continued their journey to her breasts. “But, don’t think I don’t have my ways of getting it out of you.” He sat up, his arms sliding around her back and holding her in place while he brought his face to her now exposed chest.

Xander licked her right breast and Buffy threw her head back, her hands moving to his head and locking him in place while he sucked at her flesh. she congratulated herself inwardly while her moan relayed the message to the man beneath her.

Xander’s mouth deftly switched sides while her fingers raked through his dark hair and he utilized some leg strength to flip them over, leaving Buffy pinned under him as his mouth left her breasts. His fingers skimmed back down her body while he looked straight into her eyes while he tugged her panties down her hips. “You sure this is how you want to alleviate muscle pain?” he joked, his voice thick and dark. He wanted nothing more than to be inside of her. Making love to Buffy in the morning was one of his favorite things about them sharing a bed.

“Uh huh,” Buffy’s voice was a high pitched squeak as she wriggled her hips to help with the removal of the under garment. She reached up, her hand curling around the back of his neck as she pulled him in for another kiss, her now unbound legs wrapping around his waist. “Now Xan,” she was breathy already, and with such limited foreplay. Damn Xander, always making her reasoning skills crap out on her.

Xander just grinned down at her and slid out of the grip of her thighs, which was no easy feat when dealing with the Slayer, until he was kneeling between her spread legs. His smile took on a devious demeanor as he ducked down to he breasts again licking feverously at them with a stiff tongue and nipping at the taut skin of her nipples. His next move left a wet trail from the center of her chest which segued into warm wet kisses down her stomach. Each series getting lower and lower until Buffy found herself relaxing against the pillows as Xander positioned her legs over his shoulders.

Relax was really the operative word. Xander had moved so fast and started using that perfect tongue of his to delve into her sex so quickly that her head only hit the pillows because all the muscles that her neck needed to hold it up went numb.

Xander grabbed her hips and tilted her lower body more towards his face as he used his teeth to scrape over her nether lips, using almost nibbling movements until he reached her opening……….

“BUFFYYY!!!!”

“YESSS!!!!” Buffy’s response came before her eyes opened, and it came out louder and more panty than it should have. Her eyes snapped open just as she felt Xander stab his tongue into her, still holding her hips in place, and she jerked against him, countering his movement. “Ohhhh Goddd…”

Dawn banged on her sister’s door again, “YOU HAVE TO TAKE ME TO SCHOOL!!!!!” she shouted, “GET UP!”

Xander didn’t let up on her though. Didn’t let her go. Didn’t stop fucking her with his tongue. “Harder,” she moaned out, her hand coming to rest on the back of his head and pull his mouth closer as she rolled her hips against his face.

That, Xander listened too. His pace picked up. “Yessss…” Buffy hissed out, caught up in the sounds that were emanating form between her thighs.

“Well,” Dawn called through the door, “Are you coming?!”

“Almost,” Buffy panted, hoping that only Xander could hear her. “…right there…”

Xander’s mouth slid further up through her pussy and his fingers replaced his tongue inside of her, two pumping into her quickly while his lips latched onto her clit. Buffy nearly screamed out loud while his teeth scraped over the bundle of nerves at the top of her sex while she rode his hand.

She felt it. The sweetest tension ever created started to tighten every muscle in the five cubic inches in her lower abdomen, and Xander’s fingers started moving still faster. Buffy couldn’t breathe for a moment as she concentrated fully on the pleasure that was threatening to consumer her from the inside out…

“BUFFY! TAKE YOUR SISTER TO SCHOOL!”

If there hadn’t been a constant hum in her ears, her mother’s avowal probably would have made more of an impact, but all she could hear now was her orgasm. Xander had pressed the flat of his tongue against her clit as her movements against his fingers became jerky and she came. It was so strong that she actually heard it before she completely felt it. Heard her heart pounding while she involuntarily fluttered around him; her breathy whines being suppressed by her biting her lower lip.

“I’M GOING TO BE LATE BUFFY!”

Her heart rate was slowing as Xander licked her clean before kissing up her body until they were face to face again. Buffy reached for him with trembling fingers, tracing his face before she pulled him into another kiss. Her mouth curling around his as she tasted herself and licked her flavor off of his tongue. She pulled back with a relaxed lazy smile.

“You should get up,” Xander joked, still catching his breath and Buffy placed light kisses all over his mouth and face.

She shook her head, half embarrassed, and let out a breathy laugh, “I can’t wait to get back to the dorms.”

“We can sleep at the apartment tonight,” Xander offered, “It’ll be Mom free.”

Buffy looked at him skeptically, “You’ve said that before and…”

“I forgot I didn’t get the key back form her,” he defended referring to the time he gave Joyce a key to drop off a painting he had brought from her gallery, “I got it back right after. Plus I still expected a knock…”

“Never expect a knock from a mother,” Buffy grinned up at him, “That’s why they make locks.” She added as if on cue with the rapid turning of her own door knob.

Giving Buffy one last kiss Xander rolled off of the bed stretching as he watched her climb out of bed after him. She grabbed her robe off of the chair in the corner and tied it around herself.

“I’m going to shower,” Xander told her as he stepped into her bathroom so that she could open the bedroom door, “If you’re gone when I get out I’ll see you at home later?”

Home was his place. He started calling it that to her about three months ago, as if Joyce’s weren’t her home… “Yeah,” she nodded instead, “I’ll see you later.”

Buffy prepared to open her door to stop the incessant knocking when her bathroom door flew open and Xander ran up to her, now wet from the shower, and gave her a quick kiss. “Almost forgot,” he grinned sheepishly, “Love you,” he added before retreating back into the bathroom.

“Love you too,” she smiled back to him and opened her door just as he closed his.

“Finally.” Dawn huffed out as soon as her sister opened the door, “And you’re not even dressed.” The girl shook her head, her eyes briefly catching the clothes strewn across the floor and the fact that Buffy was wearing her robe. “Aren’t you ever just not really horny?” she asked, “Or at least responsible enough to not let it get in the way of your family? GOD, Just hurry up. I’ll be down stairs.”

Dawn stared daggers at her older sister as she turned and made her way back down the stairs, “Morning to you too Dawn,” Buffy smirked and shut her door again, getting dressed as quickly ossiossible.

*~*~*

Buffy hated to drive. As much as she thought she should like it, when she finally did learn how to and went to get her license all the fun of the activity was immediately sucked out. Now driving meant having to drive to work and do grocery shopping and it seemed to her mother, driving meant chauffeuring around her little sister.

Now, Buffy loved Dawn, and as was required by sisterhood, Dawn loved Buffy, despite the fact that the younger Summers seemed content to rip her older sister a new one for the last five minutes of the ride. Buffy didn’t know how many more times she could apologize to her for making her late because it had already lost all meaning.

“Why do you want to be in school so bad anyway?” Buffy asked while resting her head in her left hand while she waited at a red light. “I’d do anything to be late to homeroom.”

“Some of us like to not be detention regulars,” Dawn smirked, “We can’t all spend the majority of our time gallivanting with the undead.”

Buffy tossed her a look, “I did not gallivant. I was working. You know, sacred duty and all that…”

“So sucking face with Angel was your sacred duty? Is that in that Slayer handbook?”

“And who says gallivant anyway?” Buffy mumbled, not acknowledging her sisters shot at her.

“People who know what it means…”Dawn suggested with a bright smile.

“I know what it means.” Buffy bit out, “I just don’t have to flaunt my vocabulary because…”

“Xander keeps your mouth otherwise occupied…”

Buffy turned to her sister with wide eyes, sputtering for words. “Don’t think I don’t know what you guys do,” Dawn continued looking straight ahead and making a lewd gesture with her hand, “God, Buffy, I’ve got a HUGE history test today, but could I get a good nights sleep? Could I even get to school on time so I could review with my friends? NO. TO BOTH. And why? Because my sister…”

“Has just gotten you to school all safe and sound.” Buffy cut her off as she stopped at the curb of the school. Dawn just rolled her eyes at her and moved to open the car door. “I’ll pick you up at 3, cool?”

“Yeah,” Dawn said as she hopped out and waved at some people Buffy didn’t recognize up on the steps of the high school.

“Good luck,” Buffy wished her and Dawn turned to face her sister, noticing the sincere look in her eyes. “You know I mean it,” Buffy insisted with a grin, “I mean, look at me. If I didn’t care about you I wouldn’t be caught dead in public in this,” she gestured down to the tank top that Dawn recognized as one of hers and the pair of Xander’s sweat pants that she was wearing. Dawn just continued to look at her so Buffy continued. “If it helps you accept my apology any I think my left boob has been de-braed since Winchester St.” she grinned again, and her little sister finally laughed a little.

“Thanks Buff,” she smirked and shut the door, only to open it again and add, “Don’t be late.”

“Promise,” Buffy nodded, crossing her heart and holding up her right hand, “See ya then.”

Buffy waited as Dawn walked up the steps of the school before pulling away and heading home. She had the work part of the day to drive to now. She swore, and Buffy Summers never saw herself thinking this possible, but she couldn’t wait for school to start again. She was almost done with her sophomore year at the University of California: Sunnydale and this winter break was taking it’s toll on her.

When she was in school she didn’t have time to think about…anything, really, besides school. She felt comfortable in the irresponsibility that everyday brought and in seeing Xander for even less responsibility at night. But this break had just given her the time to dwell on her insecurity and doubts that she was making the right choice.

No. She was making the right choice. She knew that she was. Maybe, she settled, it was just the timing. She was young, and so was Xander. And she had seen enough day time TV to know that young marriages don’t always work out.

But at the same time, she had promised herself that she would never get a divorce. She would have never accepted his proposal if that were even the slightest possibility in her mind.

But at twenty she was now engaged to the last man that she would ever kiss. She had already dated that last man she ever would. She would spend the rest of her life making love to this one man…nobody new for the rest of her life. Buffy would never have that feeling of meeting somebody new and experiencing all that stuff with them…But she was in love with Xander. Ridiculously in love with him, and ensured herself that she would never be with out him.

All her thoughts were running in circles. Constant contradictory loops that were driving her insane partially because she couldn’t talk it over with the one person she wanted to talk it over with, and mostly because they all ended with the fact that she was in love.

Buffy had never felt the way that Xander made her feel. Nobody had ever made her feel that, and in the end that was what it was all about. she asked herself as she pulled into her driveway and got out of the car.

She walked up to the front door, stooping to pick up the morning paper on the way before she entered her house. Se. She wished that she could just spend the entire day in its quiet solitude, but noooooo…she had to be the Good Samaritan and help out Giles.

Sure, he had only offered her the part time work at the Magic Box as a way for her to earn some extra money for the rest of the semester, and he was paying her well above minimum wage for doing almost nothing. And sure, actually doing something with her day would help to take her mind off all the relationshippy things…or so she thought…

Buffy dashed up the stairs and into her room, quickly hopping into the shower. She didn’t want to be late to work. That would just be plain irresponsible, and she didn’t want to let Giles down.

~*~*~*~

The Magic Box

11:56

Time was actually moving backwards.

That had to be due to some sort of demonic happenings. Buffy watched the clock over the door with glazed eyes, her head resting on her hand.

“And then Xander said that 8 kids would be perfect. I mean, you do have childbearing hips, I gotta agree with him on that.”

Willow’s voice broke into her inner thoughts and Buffy’s head snapped up to look at her, a worried look in place. “He said what?!”

Willow shook her head a little, “Oh, so that you heard…”

Buffy was still watching the red headed witch with wide eyes as she smoothed her hands down her hips, “I have wide hips?!”

Willow’s look deflated, “I was just trying to get your attention. Geez, Buff…”

“Sorry,” Buffy shook her head and let her head fall back onto her hands, “I’m just tired I guess.”

“You are pretty much out of it,” Willow agreed, “Your brain finally rebelling against all the breakage from school?”

“You could say that…” Buffy mumbled.

“Wanna tell me what else I could say?” Willow asked her best friend, trying to find out whas was wrong with her today.

Buffy let out a deep breath, “You could say…” she trailed off, “That you’d hate me if you knew what else you could say.”

“I’d never hate you, Buff,” Willow disagreed, and Buffy gave her a disbelieving look.

“What about when you turned on the light that time when I was giving Xa…”

“FINE…” Willow cracked and interrupted the Slayer, “But I’m way past that now. Totally back in friend mode, here. I want to help, seriously.” The Wicca put her resolve face in place and while Buffy looked down at the counter, “Unless it’s sexual,” she added, “I don’t want anything to do with it if it’s sexual.”

Buffy laughed in spite of herself at her friend’s avowal, “Its not sexual Wills. Don’t worry.”

“Ok then.” Willow smiled again, “Talk. Vent. Let the burden be lifted off you weary shoulders…”

The Slayer cocked her eyebrow at her. “Talk,” Willow settled and shrunk a little with a sheepish grin.

“I’m going to need you to promise not to judge me on this,” Buffy turned her head away from her friend and stated in a quiet voice.

Willow watched her and tried to read the signals that her friends defeated posture was sending off. the red head settled and set her hand on the blonde’s shoulder. “You got it Buff. I’m your No-Judgment Girl.”

Buffy offered her a weak smile and shook her head marginally, “I’m not even supposed to be thinking about this here,” she laughed weakly.

“If it helps at all,” Willow said in a cheerily sarcastic tone, “I don’t think you were thinking about anything for at least 45 minutes.” She referred to the time Buffy had spent starring blankly at the wall.

“Right,” Buffy sighed. She was doing that a lot recently; she should definitely work on that….

“Buff,” Willow called to her again to refocus her attention.

“Yeah,” the Slayer blinked, “It’s just… It…Well, I…”

“Did Tara and Giles send you a tutorial tape, or…”

Buffy shot her a surprised look and Willow looked apologetic. “Sorry,” she squeaked out, “Talk. In actual sentences…talk.”

Buffy bit her lip and tried to organize exactly what she was feeling in her mind. She couldn’t very well just rattle off her, albeit well rehearsed, mental diatribe to anyone, including Willow. Sure, they were best friends, but, friendship only went so far when you were trying to avoid institutionalization

The question seemed the way to go. Simple yes or no answer. Buffy cleared her throat, “Do you, uhm…do you think I’m too young…to get married?”

The Slayer’s voice was so low, Willow almost didn’t hear her. Almost, being the operative word, because the question set off about a dozen bells and whistles in her mind concerning the reason for such a concern. Buffy must have seen the cogs turning in her head and jumped in to justify herself.

“I mean, cuz, 20….that’s young. Don’t you think?”

Willow reminded herself. “Do you think that you’re too young to get married?” her brow furrowed.

“I asked you first.” Buffy stated defensively.

“Yeah well…You’re the one who’s getting married. I think your answers more important.”

Buffy sighed. Again. She let her head drop back down to her hands. “No. Yes. Both. I don’t know.”

“Well…” Willow started, only to be interrupted by a frantic Slayer.

“I thought no, you know? I’m all in love and everything, and that’s what people in love do…they get married.” Willow nodded, but stayed silent. “But then,” Buffy turned and faced her friend full on, looking at her with wide eyes, “Tristan, and Alex, and Spencer, and Blythe…oh God,” She was breathing heavily now and Willow was unsure of what she was talking about.

“Buff, calm down,” Willow insisted, “Who are those people?”

“His children,” Buffy shook her head, “All the kids he wants me to have. All of them already have names and…and personalities…and he knows exactly what he wants…”

“You don’t want kids?” the Wicca was still confused.

“NO!” Buffy said louder and faster than she wanted to, but then calmed down, “I mean, yeah. I do. Of course I do…later. A LOT later, but I haven’t been naming all sorts of future people…I’ve just been…”

“Freaking out and engaging in activities that will undoubtly get you a litter of future people in attempts of quelling your self-proclaimed irrational fears about the state of you and Xander’s relationship?” Willow offered for her. “Xander may have mentioned something about your new-found insatiableness,” she offered under Buffy’s confused look, “As a reason why he couldn’t help Tara and I research for Giles last week…it’s why I added my no sexual stuff clause.”

Buffy tilted her head to peer at her friend and smirked, “Something like that, Dr. Phil.” Buffy hated one sided mental dissections, especially when she was the dissectee “So you see my point?”

“You think you’re too young,” Willow offered.

“Exactly.” Buffy smiled half-heartedly. “All this commitment…it’s…it’s a little…unnatural…for 20, don’t you think?” she asked next, her argument flowing.

Willow slit her eyes suspiciously at her friend. “Wait, wait, wait…that’s COMPLETELY different than if you’re too young…that’s…that’s like…not wanting to be in a relationship at all…”

Buffy looked frightened momentarily, not wanting to portray that idea to Willow in the least. “That’s so not what I meant…I mean, I…I would never denounce commitment…”

“That’s what it sounded like.” Willow interrupted, “You didn’t…denounce…commitment with Xander, did you? Oh God! You didn’t…”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa there…Never, Wills. Never.” Buffy assured, “I’d never do that to him.” This talk with Willow was about as helpful as her talks with Mr. Gordo and herself. “I love Xander,” Buffy assured at her friends continuously concerned gaze, and Willow visibly relaxed.

“Then what’s the problem?” Willow asked, confused again, “You love him, he loves you. Yeah, you guys are young, but that doesn’t mean anything. My Nana always told me that all you really need is love…”

“That’s true,” a new voice sounded from in front of them, and both girls turned to face him.

The guy, who was standing on the other side of the counter, wore a bright, but almost shy smile as he watched them…well not them, Willow noticed. He was more specifically watching Buffy. He was about 6’3 and had sandy blonde hair and blue eyes that Willow was sure that Xander would be sure to rip out if he saw the way this man was starring at his fiancée. “Your Nana’s a smart woman,” he spoke again, shifting on his feet.

“Can I help you?” Willow answered him instead, since Buffy chose to say nothing and shift her eyes around the store.

“Yeah,” he swallowed, “I, ahh, I want to buy…this.” He nervously reached out and grabbed an orb off of the counter and slid it to Willow.

Willow berated him as she rung him up, “Is that all?”

“And this.” He added reaching into a barrel of stones to his left and pulling out several.

“Geology club meeting?” Buffy questioned with a slight smile, earning a blush from the customer.

“Something like that,” he nodded with a laugh, “Give me one of those too,” he pointed to a medium sized metal cross on the wall behind Buffy.

The Slayer regarded him for a moment before turning to retrieve the item, and Willow narrowed her eyes at him as she watched him tilt his head to the side to better view her friends reach.

“You should keep those on a lower shelf,” he commented warmly when she placed the cross on the counter and Buffy laughed out loud.

“I’ll be sure to tell Giles that,” she joked back, but then stumbled on her words, “Giles is the owner…of the store. This is his store, I just work here.” Buffy said quickly.

Willow shook her head. Buffy’s flirting skills were clearly out of practice, and she had no idea why the Slayer was choosing now to warm them up. “I’m going to go look for the case for that in the back,” Willow informed her before walking away from the counter.

Buffy watched her friend disappear into the store room before the man spoke again, “I’m Riley,” he offered, smile back in place.

“Buffy,” she said brightly, pointing to the name tag Willow had made her.

“Yeah,” Riley nodded, “I, uh…I know.” He shifted on his feet nervously, “So, uh…how long have you been working here? Is it a winter break thing?”

Buffy nodded vigorously, “The owner…Giles…he’s like my second father. I like to help him out when I can.”

“That’s really nice,” Riley said genuinely, “I…uhm…I don’t know if you know this, but I, uhm…I’ve been in here a lot. Like a lot a lot.” He stopped and took a deep breath.

“I hadn’t noticed,” Buffy admitted, and he visibly deflated a little, “But this place can turn into a mad house during the lunch rush,” she joked quickly to lighten the mood.

Riley laughed a little, “I can see that. It must be the beautiful help that Giles has working for him.”

Buffy stopped and blushed at him and he smiled in response before continuing. “Anyway…I’ve seen you around…campus…UC Sunnydale…”

Buffy nodded, a little more intrigued by the fact that he had been actively trailing her that she should have been.

“I’m a TA there actually…for Professor Walsh…”

“Oh my God…Riley Finn…Intro to Psych,” Buffy remembered.

Riley beamed and nodded to her, “Yeah. One in the same.” “Well, the point, I guess…” he stopped and licked his lips, thanking God that the other girl who was working apparently had to make the case for the cross. He hadn’t known before how much more stuff he was going to have to buy before she left. “I don’t know what this stuff is.” He said finally.

Buffy just blinked at him and shrugged her shoulders.

“I mean,” he correctly quickly, “I’ve come in here everyday for the last two weeks and I have about seven of these old tyme paper weights and more chicken feet than Colonial Sanders…” he laughed slightly.

“Did you catch that two for one sale we had…on the chicken feet?” Buffy asked only semi-interested in the answer. The man’s initial conversation tactics very closely resembling Xander’s. Buffy suddenly remembered him…

“Many times,” Riley laughed again.

“WILLS?!!? HOW”S THAT BOX HUNT GOING?!?!?!” Buffy called loudly over her shoulder and Riley flinched.

“I’M STILL LOOKING!! I DON’T KNOW WHERE GILES PUT THEM!!!”

Riley cleared his throat to regain Buffy’s attention and the Slayer turned to him with wide eyes.

“So,” he started again, with a deep breath, “Buffy,” he smiled, “I was wondering…if you would, you know…if you want to go for…”

Suddenly the bell over the door tinkled again and a new voice boomed through the store, “I’m going to need another blonde girl. Same style…I broke mine last night.”

Buffy looked at Xander and rolled her eyes as he hopped down the stairs, obviously fresh from his construction site as his jeans were still covered in dirt.

“I think if you can settle for a supped up paper weight, you’re business,” Riley joked to him over his shoulder, and Xander stopped to regard him for a moment.

“Hmmm,” he started towards Buffy again, “Have her bring some of those with her. There’ll be a hefty tip in it for you,” he wiggled his eyebrows at her as he came to her side.

Riley regarded the new man for a moment. Especially since he was standing so close to Buffy that he was looking directly down at her.

“Hey Babe,” Xander greeted quietly and Buffy leant up and pressed a quick peck to his lips. “How’s your day going?”

“Alright,” Buffy told him, noticing how close Xander seemed to insist he needed to stand to her right then. “Riley here is going to get me a huge commission,” she gestured to all the stuff he was going to buy on the counter with a smile and tried to take a small step away form him, only to be shadowed.

Riley offered her a small grin in response while his disappointment ebbed inside of him, “I gotta do my part for the eccentric office supply business.”

Xander narrowed his eyes at him while wrapping his arm low around Buffy’s waist. “Ewww,” she protested immediately, “You’re all gross,” she made a slight show of pushing him away.

Xander smiled as he whimpered a little, looking hurt, “I thought you liked me at my manliest…”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Buffy shot back, “I never said that I liked you,” She smiled directly at Riley after the comment.

Xander noted, “I remember now…you said you liked the belt and the hard hat…when I only wear the belt and the hard hat.” He leered. Xander figured it was time to let this doof know that this girl was taken.

Buffy rolled her eyes at him, about to speak… “I got it,” Willow exasperated, dragging herself out from the back room the box in hand.

“Thanks,” Riley offered weakly as Willow rang up the items.

“So, Riley,” Xander started, restating the name his fiancée apparently already knew and still standing close to Buffy, “What is it you do?”

“I’m a TA at UC Sunnydale. I helped teach one of Buffy’s classes last semester,” he nodded, using the same tone Xander had. “What is it you do?”, he hesitated to leave Xander time to introduce himself.

“Alex,” Xander complied, somewhat coldly and both Buffy and Willow shot each other a look at his tone. “Construction. For Bines & Cohen…” he continued, answering the question with a hint of pride.

“I think they did the decks for our frat houses,” Riley said while handing his credit card to Willow, “You guys to a bang up job…I mean with out you and your handy work, all us college kids would have had to get drunk inside.”

“We do what we can for the wasted youth of America,” Xander said snidely.

“You should come to one of our parties Buffy,” Riley spoke again, a slight verbal war being waged with Xander, gathering his bag off the counter, “My frat…uhm, at Lowell House is throwing an ‘End of Break’ thing at the end of the week. You should show…”

“Aren’t you going with me and Lora to pick out the China patterns for the reception?” Xander asked, going for the check mate, and Willow watched on silently in interest. “Then your Mom wants to go over what the plan is for the honeymoon...remember she and Giles are gifting it to us…”

Buffy shut her eyes and took a deep breath and collecting her thoughts, “Yeah,” she said simply, “We’ll do that stuff…in the day.” She couldn’t believe Xander right now, “A little nocturnal social interaction sounds pretty good to start the new semester.” She was going to…

Riley shook his head at Xander’s comment but spoke to regard Buffy’s, “Here, here.” The bright tone in his voice was all but gone. “So I’ll see you later in the week,” he stated and Buffy nodded, “I’ll look you up in the campus directory and give you a call with the details.” Riley started to the door, not believing that this girl…this girl had let him make a huge ass if himself, but still had more of his heart and his attention than he should let her. Buffy had made no mention to the fact that she, apparently, was engaged…and what type of people got married at 20 anyway, what is this Arkansas… “I’ll see you around Buffy.” He said simply and walked out of the store. If anything could be gathered from that expierence was that she was in doubt. That was something he could work with.

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