AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Mr. Nice guy.

by xNoxVoicex

schedule October 25, 2008 at 12:00 AM
i luv the snappy and so Spike twist!
schedule March 25, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Sounds good so far! :D
Just a note about the grammar. When a new (or different) character starts to speak, start a new paragraph because it can get really distracting/irrating to read an entire paragraph (that and the space gives the readers eyes a chance to relax).

Lookin' forward to the next chapter!
schedule March 21, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Ah a classic prank! I would suggest splitting the dialogue into seperate lines, but I think this sounds like fun! I can't wait to see the next chapter!
With Hearts,
Crys
person HMica
schedule October 6, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Well, at the very least, I'd like to see how this would be followed up. A few notes about your formating; you have got to seperate the paragraphs and speakers because the text gets too crowded and hard to read. Hope to see more soon.